Things I want to remember... Thursday night

Stephen is not a cuddler.  While I would love for him to just cuddle up to me sometimes, we are usually having so much fun together playing that I don't really miss it.  His daddy usually puts him to bed because by then I am just exhausted and it is a special time for them.  He will play with daddy's hair and they laugh together.  I know bedtime routines are supposed to be calming and relaxing, but we always have so much fun during his bedtime routine.  After his bottle he always wants to play and crawl around a little bit more and it really is a special time for the 3 of us.  And since I am with him all day, it is good for Stephen to put him to bed so they can have some time together.

Stephen goes to bed between 7:30 and 8 and sleeps until 6:30-7 in the morning.  He is a great sleeper and never wakes up at night.  Except for last night.

Around 9 we heard him crying a little and would look at the monitor and he was still laying down and would just move around for a while and then settle back down and go back to sleep.  He did this a few times, but we didn't think too much of it.  Then around 10:30 when we got into bed he started really crying.  Again, he would move around some and then settle down, but then he just kept crying and crying.  It was not like him at all.

So I decided to go upstairs and make sure he was ok.  By the time I got upstairs he was on all fours sobbing.  My poor baby.  It took a while for him to calm down while I rocked him, but he finally did.  Then he layed his head down on my chest and my heart melted!  Oh how I miss holding my sleeping baby.  I haven't held him while he slept since he gave up his catnap about a month or so ago.  He didn't go back to sleep, but he was so tired.  He kept picking his head up and looking at me and smiling and then he would put his head back down.  He was trying to get comfortable, but just couldn't.   But we cuddled for a while and it was so sweet.   I couldn't figure out why he had been crying so I decided to change his diaper and then I would know that he was fine.  It was quite wet, but that never bothers him.  After I changed his diaper we cuddled for a little while longer and then he started to rub his eyes.  I knew he was tired and as much as I was enjoying our cuddling, he needed to sleep.  So I put him back in his crib and he was not happy about that.  But by the time I got back downstairs he had stopped crying and was almost asleep.  He slept the rest of the night.

I do love that we have a great sleeper who can fall asleep on his own and I love sleeping all night in my own bed.  But last night brought back memories of those first few months when we slept together.  Sweet, fleeting moments that seemed like they would last a lifetime at the time.  Last night was another reminder to live in the moment and enjoy every second.

When he was a tiny baby I would get so sad thinking about him growing up.  I still do sometimes.   But we have so much fun with him and he brings us so much joy that I don't really find myself being sad and missing those tiny baby days too much.  I think about them with fondness and appreciate exactly where we are right now and just enjoy everyday we have with him!